After receiving the rejection letter from Princeton, I got depressed for weeks. In my whole master program application seasons, I received 14 rejction letters, with only 3 offers.

All these greatly shocked me.

I like to make short-term plans, and gain motiviation and energy from it. For example, to get into a well-known college, and fight for it.

Four years ago, when I was still a high-school student, all my friends, teachers, and family members believed that I could have got into a ivy-league, or at least some famous school such as UC-Berkeley. When I finally got all the offers and rejections, and had to go to UCLA, tbh I felt dissatisfy. I thought that those seemingly average students can get into “better” colleges, so shall I.

But spending 3 years at UCLA, I started to realize that all my schoolmates and faculties are genious, and also work hard. I should not feel “才高运蹇” (people with high ability but poor luck).

Still, when you get into UCLA, you start thinking again for ivy-league, Stanford, Caltech, etc. Just like usual, I need another short-term goal. This time I made it to be: to get into a well-know master program.

I did fight for it (though now think back, many of the works are useless). I spend only three years to finish my Bacholar degree, with full 4.0 GPA, more than half of the grades I received is A+. I participated in three research labs, got the recommendation letters. I lead a club to launch high-altitude bloon (it falled into a military base btw lol)…

But, it turns out to be another round. When all my friends, teachers, and family members believed that I could get into a good program again, I got 14 rejection letters. I end-up staying at UCLA for MS CS program (I originally took it as my minimum guarantee). The 14 rejection letters make me feel like all the things I have done, all the efforts I have made towards my short-term goal, are denied, are gone, are useless.

After two consecutive failures for my short-term goal, I felt confused. To be honest, I don’t know what to do and what I should do right now. Hope I can figure this out later.